Kuch toh kehna hai… par kya?
It’s been too long since I have last posted. Even if I have,
it has been meaningless expressions or quotes. I have no idea why I had written
them or what significance they had then and whether or not they would be of any
importance right now. But I think it is about time that I write something… but
what?
When I was stuck at this question, I remembered that people
have already written about this ‘state of being’ (for the lack of my limited
vocabulary to come up with better words). Someone, probably a senior teacher, had
written an article in Gosumag about how Gosumag editors were behind here to
write something and she couldn’t come up with what to write about. Someone had
also written a poem about it. So I thought let me also ‘copy’ them and try to
write about pot being able to write or ‘this state of being’ which I am not
able to define appropriately.
It first starts with, where do you start writing. Should I start
thinking about points while I am standing assisting on a case or should I make
notes on my cell phone while travelling home? But since I haven’t done both of
these yet… I need to start now, while I am aimlessly staring at the computer… Should
I write directly on the ‘create new post’ link or should I first write it on ms word and copy paste it later. But
then, like a few of my other posts this too should become another half-drafted
post which lies around in my hard-disc, never to see the light of day.
But while I am at it, I feel too lame even to share this on blogger
site. Isn’t this too meaning- less and probably full of grammatical errors and
wrong spellings? I mean, I can’t write perfect-English edited posts like sum or
veen or shqun (Please don’t mind the deliberately written wrong spelling- it’s
with all due respect to your blogs that I have loved reading for so many years). And then, the content, it’s all so real. The intricate
details observed by sum or the simplistic take on issues, which I could so
easily follow. And veen’s endearing posts which bring a smile on your face…
they make you have ‘a good one’.
Then I thought, I can write about things that have happened
during the postings in the last 18 months… the patients, the co-workers, the
seniors and the general interactions around the ward. But I had written about
that already during internship year and it would be a repetition. Unless of
course, I could find words that flow like swrp sir and his really lengthy but captivating
articles on almost everything that happens in kem… from patients (read his
recent laughing-crying post) or mugging and extremes level of excellence (anp
sir’s post) or movie-style romance (ashli anyone?).
I am not that fluent with words. So, I could probably try
keeping the word count to a minimum but infuse a multitude of interpretations in
a few abstract sentences and gather praise from one and all for my
unconventional and higher order aberration in thinking like kkd (meant only as
lots of praises and a awe for the kind of thought process you have and I cannot
reach, even though I try. To be taken as compliments only). But as I said, even
if I try, I am not able to.
Poems then… like sambh. Really? I have a thought block already.
Alright then, enough of this nonsense. I am bored already
and I think anyone who would read this would get bored too. Though I wish I could
write about ani and nnya and their works or art and sensible blabbering respectively.
But I can’t. It’s boring. So let me just end it right here and think for topics
and write an actual blog post.
